since I'm very depressed, I've decided to read Camus's "The Plague". that should cheer me right up

had my cardiologist check up, one year after my stent. everything is fine! aside from a few small weird unrelated things. but he was very happy that my vitals are either in or getting to the right places. and as a small aside, I got my first hospital bracelet with my gender marker updated:

just changed my pronouns at work (email signature, etc.) I am totally not panicking!

it is important to go insane for the natural world, to feel a terrifying rush of love and tenderness towards the world below and above and around you, and to experience yourself as part of it, instead of something held back from it. it is important to carry mountains, sunlight, trees, and autumn with you, to use it in the narrow hallways of hospitals or the darkness of your bedroom at three o'clock in the morning. even if you can't recall it, somewhere under your ribcage last year's seeds are trying to grow, seeking the sun, driving you with their survival this year and every year next.

can't help but notice this DEI meeting has nine people in it all of the same race and gender. the look on my face must be fucking priceless. thank god my camera is broken. if I have to slam it into the ground, it will be broken

I can't believe it took me until age 42 and the perusal of a Pierre Trudeau biography to realize that politics is just people and all the rules we think are in place are fucking illusions

the dog of park #DogsOfMastodon

Elk Island (Amisk Wuche Trail and Astotin Lake) this morning.